It the difficult experiences, harrowing places, complicated personalities that catapult you to a wildly different, exciting plane of thought and being.

When people tell you not to love, not to experience, not to change, do it.

  

Today, I looked outside the window of my taxi ride, really gazed at people, maybe even into their eyes, if I was brave.

I read somewhere(I never remember) that the faces you see in your dreams belong to real people out there in the world, your mind is an unending film roll and it captures all the sights and sounds around you.

So I collected some today, soon I'll find them in my dreams, maybe meet them, somehow even talk naturally, without feeling strange or afraid or self conscious. 

Crying is good for your face, it may also have a positive side effect for your heart

Not an expert in such matters but nobody nowadays care for expert opinions anyway so.

It is getting harder and harder to talk to people these days. Therefore crying sorta helps, alone preferably, otherwise people will feel obligated to be shocked and offended at your tears.

Loneliness is a bag of chips, you run out, hurry to the nearest social gathering and stock up.

Loneliness is a complicated flavor, it's a mix of varied ingredients, some are subtle, others blow up in your face, so protect your face....I think?  I'm just making things up, like a regular person.    

There are thousands upon thousands of movies, articles, info graphics and 'expert opinions' on loneliness. In these movies, for example, people are all over each other, hugging, listening, kissing, socializing after sharing their stories by embarking on an epic journey that transcends race, sex and other social barriers. Real life is a bit different, try any of those things, you would be better off watching the movie and promptly filing it under 'lies' in your memory palace. It only serves as a vital 'things never to do, ever.' reminder, nothing more.

So what crying does for you is it get's your heart feeling again, and also clears those clogged pores on your face(don't know if this is true, i just made it up). Don't let your beating, blood pumping heart turn cold and unfeeling, blood is life, the heart regulates that life so remember to feel.

Lastly, I think most people are lonely for many wildly different reasons but it's like a universal truth so take it easy. Because It'll go away soon and you will be better.

I wonder if my friend is writing but I'm afraid to ask now

Won't insult your intelligence. I hope you are having a fantastic time doing psychological things and also staying safe.

You were my mirror, my dear friend, not anymore.......
I guess.
I wish we were, but It's me and It's you and things will forever be like this.

I fear and forget to say and do. I like the corners of rooms where it's safe, you are braver and stronger than I'll ever be.

You probably don't read this because you are finally over this bullshit and I can't blame you.

Please don't stop writing, I love your world and your words.

what I saw in a Wong Kar Wai movie

Film and film making seems to be about containing and simultaneously enlarging the fragments of life. Transferring and reinterpreting and re-arranging the unstoppable ebb and flow of time.
Capture the veil, the fabric that cushions reality, people feeling things, doing things and affecting events.

What really goes on- we don't know, directors are people too, they do their best to share their ideas but the film isn't the final answer. It is a beautiful medium, in fact a great movie can show us each other, we become a mirror reflecting the other person and the other reflecting us. We are different but the soil of our soul is the same.

Anyway, the above is a bit haphazard and unruly and grandiose and maybe contains many many grammatical mistakes and most honestly not pure in its lack of originality.

Wong Kar Wai. He provides the sea, the lonely boat only for you to climb in and float in his world of half actions and endless innerlogues and excruciating, always mesmerizing sweetsour of loneliness. 

Talking one type of horseshit and then promptly doing other kinds of horse-shitty things

I'm a forgetful person, which is not like an excuse or anything of that sort, I just would want to present facts as they are. 

I'm also an idealist when it comes to other people. I conveniently forget, a favorite personality quirk of mine, this idealism when I'm involved in doing things. 

So when I inconveniently remember that I forgot to apply in my own life the idealistic horseshit I dished out for other people's benefit, denial is a knee-jerk reaction followed by crippling shame that, in a twist of plot, acts as a growth hormone for my ego and so in order to salvage what's left of my dignity I must stop.

why are comics sad people? and why you and I are sad too

This too simplistic an assumption to make, about comics I mean. They are people with lives and life is just shitty to everyone, even those of us who like to make a few jokes at its expense. The 'us' in the previous sentence doesn't include me though.

I recognize jokes when they pop at the horizon and I enjoy them maybe a bit too much than the average human but I cannot mentally register and recall articulately, any sort of hilarity taking place in my vicinity.

If I had a time machine, we could go to a simpler time where childhood photos weren't a work of the devil and were fit for exorcism by fire but were simply innocent, socially green-lit documentation serving as a window into sweet, sweet familial moments of yester years.

We would be able to deduce from those pictorial documents, pre- exorcism, that the androgynous(honestly more boyish than girlish) kid peering through will never grow up to be someone who will be able to intentionally arouse laughter in people.

So It has been proven in this present times.

Back to comics being sad people just like you and me. I guess that's it mostly, we forget that funny people don't magically skip all the shittiness and fuckallness of living by virtue of them being able to show others and themselves all the funny bits. The sad bits are still in the picture, in the corners making up the frame. Maybe, after a point, the pressure to be funny all the time gets to them and the corners with the sad bits start closing in and suffocating the circle of funny we always expect them to show us.

This is mostly guesswork and some facts that I may have unconsciously picked up on the internet, I guess.